Consciously Coupled: Owen Thiele and Jared Ellner on Working Side by Side and Being Gemini-for-Scorpio

It’s the age-old question that’s sparked a thousand romance novels and lovelorn midnight Google searches: how do you make a relationship work? Especially when both parties are very busy? In this column, we’ll be talking to some of our favorite star-for-star pairs about how they work together, inspire each other, and navigate love in the public eye.

It’s been a big summer for Owen Thiele, arguably the breakout star of the recently released second season of FX’s Adults. But things are no less busy for Thiele’s partner, Jared Ellner, a stylist known for dressing everyone from Sabrina Carpenter and Olivia Rodrigo to Emma Chamberlain.

Thiele and Ellner, who have been dating since college, some 11 years ago (“I dropped out two weeks after I got there, but in those two weeks, I met Jared Ellner, so it was worth the tuition,” jokes Thiele), and who live together in Los Angeles, are linked by more than romance: Ellner is also Thiele’s stylist. So it’s safe to say the two have learned quite a bit over the years about how to balance work and love.

This week, Vogue chatted with the couple—who had just arrived at the Venice Film Festival, which Thiele was attending as a guest of Armani Beauty—to find out more about their bond.

Vogue: What has life looked like for you two lately?

Jared Ellner: Everything’s been good! Owen’s been in, like, a tornado whirlwind with the premiere of Adults, so we’re sprinting and we’re tired, but we’re grateful.

What are your astrological signs? Does your partner’s feel reflective of their personality?

Ellner: I’m a Gemini, and Owen is a Scorpio.

Thiele: I honestly think both of them feel pretty accurate for both of us. I actually don’t know much about astrology and astrological signs, to be honest, but I do hear that Geminis are two-faced and Scorpios are horrible to be around. So if if that’s the case, I think we’re a match made in heaven. [Laughs.]

What was the tell, for each of you, that the relationship had “become serious”?

Ellner: This is a very earnest answer, but I was going through some personal family things and Owen and I were good friends at the time. He was so compassionate and thoughtful in ways that people I had known for 20 years weren’t, and I realized that this was probably much more serious than I thought.

Thiele: I think my answer is the first time we had sex. I got really attached.

What are you the most likely to argue about?

Thiele: I feel like we’re a normal couple and bicker about things that everyone bickers about, like unmade beds and clothes scattered everywhere. But also, because we work together, there is a level of trust that we have in each other, career-wise. Sometimes we’ll ask for each other’s advice and we don’t like the honest answer, so we might argue about that. It’s like when you’re hoping that your therapist will tell you that you’re in the right…

Ugh, and then they don’t!

Thiele: Exactly. Please don’t be honest with me, ever. Jared is very, very honest and and very wise, and so I’m forced to listen to him, even though it’s probably not a good idea and sometimes I get upset about it.

What’s one thing you’ve learned from each other?

Ellner: I have learned that Owen has an incredible amount of patience. No matter how exhausted he is, he will still find a way to talk to every person in the room and make them feel like the most loved people that ever existed. It’s an amazing lesson I’ve learned from him.

Thiele: Actually, I’ve learned a different kind of patience from Jared. Jared is very calm and grounded and patient when he doesn’t have to be, so it’s not necessarily making everybody feel like the most important person in the room—which, by the way, can be a toxic thing because I will stay out for way too long—but but it’s more so just making people feel very understood and heard, even if it’s through a short little conversation that he has with them.

What’s your favorite way to spend time together when life is getting crazy?

Thiele: Well, Jared styles me, and I still pay him to style me because he’s a stylist, even though I’m his boyfriend…I’m staring daggers at him. I know this sounds so cheesy, but getting a trip like this where I’m here in Venice with Armani Beauty, and I’m so lucky to be here, and I’m so lucky to have a plus-one, and my plus-one happens to be my stylist, who happens to be my boyfriend…you know? It’s a dream. I feel like very few people work well together while in also in a relationship, and I feel like we have managed to do that. There are great times we wouldn’t have if we weren’t also working together.

This conversation has been edited and condensed.

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